About Me

Thursday, March 23, 2017

WHEN LOVE MEETS DISCERNMENT

"She needs you to back off,  Mary does this every year. She is too afraid to say anything to you. She loves you and does not want to hurt your feelings."
My friend Lisa called me to discussed our mutual friend Mary and the upcoming Christmas Party.  My heart broke as Lisa gently shared Mary's feelings. 
I was new to the church and wanted to serve.  Lisa and I became instant friends. She introduced me to Mary. Mary was sweet and kind.  Mary and I decided to plan a Christmas get together at her house.  She was eager for me to help.  Little did I know she orchestrated a party every year, it was the highlight of many people's Christmas. 
 Being the zealous party planner that I am, wanting to fit in and carry my load I called her to offer ideas and assistance.  The next Sunday we spoke after Church.  The following week I called to say hi and discuss the details of the upcoming party.  She seemed hesitant of my ideas.  I was confused. 
 Are we planning this together?     

After my phone conversation and prayer with Lisa, I realized that my motive was to be admired and accepted.  I never inquired about Mary's ability to plan a party. I assumed she needed me to take on more responsibility.
I picked up the bible and through tears of repentance I read Philippians 1:9-10. These verses became part of THE PRAYER



I pray this so that our love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment.   Help us to approve what is excellent.   Lord change us so that we will be pure and blameless for the day of Christ,  





Knowledgeepignōsis: recognition, full discernment, acknowledgment
Discernment- aisthēsis: perception, judgment.
Approvedokimazō: to test, examine, prove, scrutinize, deem worthy

As I prayed to have delicate discernment is all situations, especially with Mary, God gave me the wisdom to call her and apologize for my selfishness.   
She apologized for not speaking with me first.
The party was wonderful.  We sang Christmas Carols, ate great food and thanked God for Jesus.  I understand why everyone looked forward to it.
Mary and I are still great friends. Lisa too. 
The evil one desired us to remain in unspoken hurt and pain, placing an unseen wall between us (Click to Tweet)
When love meets discernment, the fruit of God's glory and righteousness is revealed. Walls are torn down and love prevails.
When did you need discernment? Please join the conversation.  



8 comments:

Crickett said...

Love how you listened to God in this situation and talked through things with Mary. Great reminder to be attentive to God's prompting in our lives. Thanks for sharing this.

CHERRILYNN BISBANO said...

Thank you for your encouragement. I'm blessed by you

Leigh Powers said...

It's so easy for little things like this to become the tools Satan uses to tear apart friendships. We do need discernment and wisdom in quickly resolving problems and preserving our friendships and our unity.

CHERRILYNN BISBANO said...

Amen, sister

Lonnie said...

Well, I am pretty amazed with the timeliness of your post. I have struggled, for a few months with hurts in a close friendship. Name: Lisa 8-) Thank you for your post. This is a new and hard lesson for me.

Cathy Chung said...

It's tricky to say hard things even to good friends let alone someone we just met. Mary didn't want to hurt your feelings. I recently had to say some 'truth in love' things to my best friend and it was extremely difficult. After some yelling (yes, sadly), we understood each other and our friendship grew stronger. It doesn't always work that way.

CHERRILYNN BISBANO said...

Anytime a relationship is strained it's difficult. I'm glad my post help.

CHERRILYNN BISBANO said...

Thank you for sharing. I'm glad things worked out. Confrontation is not easy. May God be glorified whenever we have to speak with somebody.